Sorry, Charley…

Sorry, Charley…

You don’t initimidate me.

Just wanted to let you know that I am alive and well with very little or no property damage. The eye of Charley passed approximately 20 miles southeast of where I am, so we saw all the fun of the outer wall of it. No tornadoes that I saw, although there was a report of one in the area. Amazingly we never lost power or cable, but the water pressure is a bit low and there were a few brown-outs (a dip in the electricity that’s just enough to flicker the lights). Just to give you some idea of what a hurricane is like:

1. Everyone rushes to the store, clearing the shelves of D-batteries (and only that size), water, bread, and milk. It’s pretty much like a snowstorm rush minus the cold and added palm trees.

2. You are glued to your television trying to figure out where the hell the storm is going to go. If you’re in the projected path, chances are you are not going to be hit. If you aren’t in the projected path, you’ll be hit with the worst of the storm. Laugh incessantly at the soon-to-be Darwin Award winners interviewing and being interviewed and trying to stand upright in 75 mph winds.

3. Fill the bathtub with water. That way if your toilet doesn’t have enough pressure to flush, at least it won’t stink. If not, it’s a place to stick the Koi so that they aren’t washed out of the pond and into the neighbor’s once-chlorinated pool that is now home for the plastic lawn furniture.

4. Open your front door during the strongest point of the storm to watch your stupid neighbor drive into her garage. Then take pictures and home movies of the horizontal rain, 90 degree bent palm trees, and trash can lids hurling down the street at mach 1.

5. Eat, drink, and be merry. Play 52 pick-up because you can and there’s nothing better to do than drink.

6. Wonder when you’ll actually need to be into work the next day and what kind of damage was incurred there. Debate about updating your tetanus and hepatitus shots… yeah… right. And that’s if you’ll be able to function with the hang-over you have from drinking too many hurricanes.

7. Listen to the garage door rattle and the air pressure blow the doggie-door horizontal. Watch the cats freak out, then watch the roommates flip out, too.

8. Use the cat for a mop. Then bathe the cat in the water-filled bathtub.

9. Realize the tone that you’re hearing on the television is not a test and that this is an actual emergency.

10. Jump on the phone to call all friends and relatives. Then wonder why you have no cell service or home phone service. Everyone else is trying to do that, too!

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I'm an Information Architect and Taxonomist in the greater Philadelphia, PA area. Mad about metadata. Incessant organizer. Knowledge monger. Information seeker. Wisdom chaser. Curiosity has yet to kill this cat!